The Woes Of The Runny curries!!!

Vodka cooks like a dream(this was something I had scorned before as I was cooking in imagination and I was better than Sanjeev Bloody Kapoor!!! so where would I give credit to Dear Vodka)

"You are going to die, man!!!", says BBC.
I am making another experiment which we (Desi,Dear T and Princess) call dinner.
Indian Masalas are a big point of discussion if you might call it. Forget the europeans, no one in the world has the nose, lungs or a stomach for Indian food in its resplendence(here i dramatise and exaggerate!!!)
To give a background, I have been at the University-which-accepted-me with T and Princess and here is the catch, Hold your breath!!! I am the official chef...
So I make my first dal and with great premonition I ask my Guinea Pig, T, taste. And I look on for that historic moment which would decide her future and also mine...
"Its nice..." Says T(awww!!! choo chweeet...)
"What?" , Says Desi...
"Really???" now i really was fishing for compliments you would think but no I was really marvelled by those two words...
She nods I guess cause she couldn't speak cause of thhe sludge in her mouth I guess...
So, that encouraged me and since then I made
Rajma- lovingly called the runny tough to chew stones...(Too much water, and rajma as it was supposedly cooked)
Egg Curry- Lovingly the almost chick...(burnt by ignorance)
Mushrooms- Lovingly the fungus which T doesnt eat(I was shocked how someone cant like mushrooms that was until i tasted what i cooked)
Paratha&Chappatis- Lovingly the jaw workout with lesson in world geography)
Mashed Patatos- Lovingly everything but the patatoes mashed!!!
Its been fascinating how T has survived till this day but what needs do be given a thought is how she would survive the whole year...
The kitchen with its hobs(thats what the bloody brits call the gas chulha and it doesnt have a flame), the kettle(which these people use to warm water for coffee and tea, I wonder why???), the microwave and the oven(now why in heaven's name do we need both of these??? I was answered soon enough...)
T was put off with the report which the Halls(Thats the place we live is called) managment gives cleanliness in kitchen each week (they give a star and there thanks , for some reason T wants it real bad...Hmmm!!!) and the first report was highly unsatisfactory and T wasnt upset cause of that but that the kitchen opposite to ours got a star... I know, I know... but she wants the star but the other nine peole don't so poor T would have to wait till christmas to get the star cause all the europeans wold go home... Untill then she hates wednesday...
SO well Its the first of the kitchen woes but hey don't despair I am now giving Cooking lessons to Princess (to be fair she makes some decent chicken but the BBQ sauce is a little too much but she doesnt mind) so imagine how big a disaster (I mean a feast obviously!!!) is in the pipeline.
But hey look at the bright side, we(by we i really mean I but why make it so plain?) haven't burnt or blown the kitchen!!!
So until then
Desi signs off...
Namaste!!!